(from my first post “Proem”)
Salaam alaykoum – Greetings of Peace upon all
Welcome to my new blog on WordPress.com. This isn’t my first blog, I’ve actually published other blogs on MSN spaces and Blogger.com. I didn’t write much on the latter, but I’ve had my MSN blog since 2005 — it’s called Realm of Mystics and Seekers. I’ve been quite devastated and depressed lately, and so I thought making another blog would be a healthy way to recover. I chose to discontinue posting on my other blog because it’s filled with memories and I feel it’s better to leave it untouched.
Before I continue, I guess a brief introduction would be nice. I just turned 24 years earlier this month. I consider myself a devout Muslim and although I don’t call myself Sunni, Shia, or Sufi, I was born Sunni, but share many Shia and Sufi beliefs. I believe a lot of ignorance exists about Islam in the western world, but there is also plenty of ignorance about it within the Muslim community. I strive to journey on a mystical path – one which enables me to travel closer to my true Self, God, and Love. I’m also a student/independent filmmaker. Lately, I’ve been focusing on material that discusses Muslims in the post 9/11 era. Obviously there are a lot of misconceptions about Muslims in the media, and I believe having prominent voices in the media would significantly help break stereotypes. My other interests include psychology, music, art, poetry, reading, writing, philosophy, photography, roller hockey, and a whole bunch of other things!
Anyway, back to the reason why I decided to create another blog: I lost my Soul Mate. People may laugh at that, but whatever I experienced with her was the Truest thing I ever felt. This blog is not about her, it’s not about our problems, it’s about venting and “moving on” I guess, although I’ve been despising this phrase lately. I’m sure there are many other people who have gone through this, but I just feel that whatever happened to us was unfair. I never felt so broken and weak before. What happens to all the beautiful experiences that people share together. What happens to all the things that were spoken, expressed, and created in the Name of that Special Love?
I can’t eat sometimes. I can’t sleep because every night I dream of her. When I look at the sky, I don’t see anything. I’ve begun to question God’s plans. I question all the signs that I truly felt were Divine. We always held God close in our relationship, but one day, she lost feelings. She doesn’t even know herself what the reason was. And what can I do? I cannot force anyone to feel something. But after such a profound relationship, how can I forget all the Beauty, all the Truths, and all the wonderful moments we shared? Where does it all go? Other people break up because of cheating/unfaithfulness, lying, or physical abuse, but we had none of this. Sure, arguments here and there, but everything was beautiful. I do not believe our relationship lacked logic or reason, but perhaps she believed that. Perhaps she saw our lives were not compatible because of our separate careers and ambitions.
Thank you for reading so far. I promise to make this blog interesting, and if you find it worth visiting and would like to come back, you are more than welcome to. Thank you.
Salaam/Peace
~ Broken Mystic
wa Huwa bi-kulli shay’ in ‘Alim (57: 3)
He has full knowledge of everything. ( Iron:3)
But lately, broken by the Truths I cling to
I once wrote: leave all that is temporary
Forget Tomorrow
Now is the time to rebel
Against the army of your Ego
The Chosen One said, ‘Die before you Die’
Renounce your fears
Retreat from the world, and take a step inside
Expand with the Universe
Submit yourself in this Trance
Be born again to Heaven’s Love
And Let the Rival Witness how
The Dead Can Dance
darvish said,
February 18, 2008 at 2:36 am
Excellent
I am adding you to my blogroll 
Ya Haqq!
Shahrzad said,
February 20, 2008 at 8:04 pm
Waw, your blog is amazing and has very nice fotos. I adore miniatures
Abdul. said,
February 23, 2008 at 10:21 pm
Very Nice blog
Keep up the goodwork!
Abdul. said,
February 24, 2008 at 11:44 am
Sob sob, another broken heart love story! The internet is becoming quite famous for doing that
I know it hurts, i like you already!
Can i ask you one question BM, did you ever meet your soulmate face to face? did you speak to her in person? Or was it just all on the Internet? You dont have to answer if you dont want to, i understand.
Anyway, take care. Feel free to hop along to my blog if you like! If you like.
Abdul. said,
February 24, 2008 at 11:45 am
Love the picture btw
Duniya said,
February 24, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Abdul. That was insensitive and uncalled for. You may not take heartbreak seriously but please don’t patronize and insult others who have experienced it. Perhaps you have not felt heartbreak and so don’t realize how difficult it is. Therefore, it may be best not to make judgements about someone’s else’s pain.
btw Abdul – how is it even possible to have a soul mate you’ve never met? Has that happened to you?
Abdul. said,
February 24, 2008 at 10:30 pm
I did’nt mean it to be insensitive and making fun of broken mystic’s heartbreak and pain! Believe me, i know what heartbreak is! I was’nt making fun of broken mystic and Allah is my witness inshallah.
and to your question, no it is not possible to have a soulmate you have’nt met. Looking back with hindsight my comments do seem insensitive and uncalled for!
Forgive me broken mystic. I did’nt mean to offend you or make fun of your loss.
Jaffer said,
February 27, 2008 at 10:06 pm
Salaams, I just whizzed by.
I feel your pain my friend and these are the facts of life as well. You surviving your experience makes you more stronger than any one else who hasn’t experienced it.
[It also makes one think why Allah chose the hardest tests for the Prophets He sent]
Atabek said,
March 19, 2008 at 6:51 am
Interesting blog.
How many times was Hussain’s heart broken in Kerbala?
So don’t be sad my broken friend.
MysticSaint said,
March 27, 2008 at 2:00 am
peace and blessings be with you dear friend and i send my light to your heart.
from one mystic to another.
Zios said,
June 7, 2008 at 1:49 am
Alaikum Salam!..
One of nice blogs I have come across lately..words that come from heart, do affect…but you and I know… that we don’t know anything about tomorrow…and inshAllah it will be a better one with new relationships and new love…leading to THE LOVE.
Demetric Muhammad said,
June 12, 2008 at 7:57 pm
As-Salaam-Alaikum,
Sorry about your loss, however the best medicine for a broken heart is work.
Deepen yourself in your life’s work, whatever you see as your contribution to the onward growth of righteousness in the world increase your efforts in that area.
Remember Allah is in charge of the affairs of men. He reminds the Muslims in the Qur’an ” could be that you hate a thing that is good for you.” This loss could be a blessing in disguise. Don’t feed into your negative feelings about it. Don’t begin to feel sorry for yourself. Go and be around the righteous Muslims whereever you live. You need the company of the righteous to come out of your funk.
Peace my brother…if you take this advice you can unbreak the broken mystic (smile)
Nell Al-Attas said,
June 15, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Ahlaan, ya akhi,
Masyaallah, a very interesting site. Do not be sad Broken Mystic for Allah has given you pain to keep you closer to Him. You should be proud of yourself. Always seek forgiveness from Him. Indeed, your sadness is felt and it is a reminder for all of us. Thank you for sharing. May Allah Bless you always, amin..
brokenmystic said,
June 19, 2008 at 6:36 am
Salaam Demetric and Nell
May Allah bless you for your kind words and prayers. I appreciate your advice, and I know that Allah is always Present. It’s so difficult after such an unexpected separation, but I suppose it just wasn’t meant to be.
My friends have been a great support for me, alhamdullilah. Whenever the time is right, I have faith that Allah will bless me with my Soul Mate, insha’Allah.
AbuAbdulla82 said,
June 20, 2008 at 6:47 pm
jazakum Allahu kahir for your blog brother….I too know what heartbreak means, may Allah protect all of us. Just remember the hadith of the prophet peace be upon him — if any of you experiences a calamity then compare it to the my calamity (ie. the calamity of the ummah in losing the prophet) and every calamity in comparison is small.” May Allah help us to love Allah and the Prophet peace be upon him with all of our hearts and always try to keep the right perspective…..
salaam
Maya said,
August 7, 2008 at 12:53 am
Peace isn’t the absence of war- it is living in the presence of God.
Trust that the same creator who holds up the nine known planets and countless galaxies is watching over you right now- this very moment I type this and this very moment you read this.
The soul is truly healed- never forget that.. look within instead of without and bring that healing to the physical.
Come on.. the entire world is waiting for you to continue with your life purpose- the very reason you, an Earth Angel came to Earth to do. 
Hugs,
Maya
Dana said,
August 18, 2008 at 2:31 pm
May voices such as yours be raised and shared. You speak in beauty, peace and love. Blessings upon you and thank you.
seeker2008 said,
August 31, 2008 at 8:02 am
Hello there beautiful blog. I feel your pain.I hope things have been better. Remember you are not suffering alone until all of us have joined with the absolute there can be only suffering and incompleteness beautiful posts I really admre your blog
e.zarah said,
September 7, 2008 at 8:39 am
Happy Ramadan to you. Know that you’re in the middle of Ramadan and I’ll keep it brief:
Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.
— Flavia Weedn
I consider myself very fortunate to have known 3 Loves all were freely given. 2 were by design and the latter I asked for and it was granted, all for life. Wish I could draw you a diagram of my heart. Those loves are: God (Allah,Yah, El Shaddai), My Husband (and Family) and Dearly Beloved Friend–Him, them and him.
God is working wonders in your life as He is for all of us. Patience is key. Beauty for ashes…Isaish 61.
Maj'ness said,
September 8, 2008 at 11:26 pm
When Allah takes something away from us be sure he’s going to replace it with someting better provided we are patient and accept it without complaint. The real love is devine love and if by losing that love you’ve received a stronger connection with Alllah then Subhnallah. The cure for a broken heart is to fall in love again. May Allah bring to you a most beautiful pious wife. If we make pece with Allah HE makes peace with us.
Also tr not to bring her thoughts to your mind and heart, turn your thoughts away to other things. Make sure you survive and come out a stronger person in every sense.
Allah Loves You..The pain is in reality a cure..Just like a doctors operation where they cut us up..looks bad from the outside but the person being operated on consents to it and even pays for it.
ma salams
brokenmystic said,
September 9, 2008 at 5:04 am
Thank you all for your support, advice, and beautiful words. It really means a lot to me. I’m sorry I’m not able to respond to everyone individually, but please know that each of your comments really helped make a difference. I cannot express how much your words mean to me.
Thank you all
Sana said,
October 2, 2008 at 3:01 am
Hello BM,
Eid Mubarak!
You’re missing a W! But wait a second, would that then make it Broken Mystic Wings?
Don’t be broken, nothing is worth it, and I mean NOTHING.
Going through some of your posts got me broken..but here’s the good news. How many do you know who can start anew? In the process of healing there’s nothing better than a brand new start, a brand new life, with all of your past experiences serving as wise counselors, you’re on top of the world! How rare this chance of having a clear slate, promise of a new love–how very exciting!
So once you think you’re ready, get the dust off your wings, give your blog a makeover, change the title, the sad stories, the vanished past, and make it about YOU instead of about someone you once knew. Cuz frankly, broken mystic doesn’t tell us who you are, cuz that’s not who we see.
From one random soul to another: peace!
brokenmystic said,
October 7, 2008 at 3:25 am
Salaam Sana,
Thank you! Eid Mubarak to you as well. It’s always great hearing from random Souls
I’m grateful for the wonderful people that I’ve met after my break up and they’ve helped me in so many ways. I thank Allah for them. There are still some days when I get down, and it feels like I will never find that special Love again, but I eventually pull myself out of it.
It takes time, and I know that Allah is the best of all healers. I believe the blog is becoming more about me now. My earlier posts were more centered on my heartbreak, but now I’m writing about social, political, and spiritual things.
I will change the name of this blog some day, insha’Allah. I already have a name in mind
I guess that’s a good sign too. Insha’Allah, I’m getting there.
Thanks for visiting! Please feel free to visit again.
majnun said,
October 21, 2008 at 3:23 pm
sorry that you were sad n depressed.. but remember God Gives HIs Beloveds only Good things even if the seem bitter and only takes away Bitter things even if the seemed sweet to us.
have faith.. everything passes, every emotion is just a motion in time. I don’t need to tell you to keep the Akhirah in mind and death and stuff..
Btw don’t do nothing that takes you away from Allah and the Quran is both a guiadance and a healing.. but u already know this mashallah.. but reminding always benefitted the muslims.
surjit said,
December 13, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Truthful words:
‘Die before you Die’
Renounce your fears
Retreat from the world, and take a step inside
Expand with the Universe…’
The poem is full of universal message.
Thanks for sharing.
God bless.
Crimsonsilk said,
December 22, 2008 at 4:37 pm
A beautiful blog. I hope your heart is on the way to being healed, inshallah… from one in something of a similar position, having resurrected the blog after my heartbreak. Nothing eases the pain, but do keep busy; life births and sustains a momentum of its own. There is a reason behind everything. As you prevent a child from something it desires because you know it is ultimately harmful, or there is something better in store, so Allah does with us.
Yenney said,
January 23, 2009 at 7:45 pm
I recently came across your blog through a friend of mine. I found your page very moving and touching. As someone who has lived with my soulmate for the past 15 years, I would find myself devastated to be without him.
I also agree that us Westerners have great misconceptions, not only about Muslim but of most everything not “American”. Which I find perplexing because we are made up of so many different cultures and religions. I believe it’s do to ignorance and laziness and the need to have something or someone to hate. I hope I do not fall into this category.
Though I do not know a lot about the Muslim community, I am trying to learn. We are all just people after all. We all hurt, love, live. Why can’t we do it without the hate?
I am hoping our new President can undo some of the damage our last fear mongering President did. I really believe he has the will to bridge the gap. Whether he will succeed or not will be tested over time not only by him but by our nation as a people. I hope I am around long enough to see it.
I hope you succeed in your journey and I hope you have begun to heal.
Rafael said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:33 am
As salam ‘alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
Keep us in your prayers!
Wasalam.
Karissa said,
February 16, 2009 at 4:59 am
I really needed to see this today.
Sarah said,
March 14, 2009 at 9:19 am
I have found your blog through a search for miniature and ancient islamic paintings as im working on designing a historical book cover translated from Persian into Arabic ..
the title is about Sultan Jalauddin Khawarezm Shah from the Khorezm or Khawarezm Estate .. back in the 11th century ..
I am a painter and a book cover designer … with many other passions ..
anyway .. I was struck with the beauty of the painting as always .. though i’ve seen many alike … but i can never stop being amazed of our islamic art … which i hope to specialize in when i start my art history studies ..
im also struck with … the beauty i’ve sensed through ur sincere text-allow me to use the word text here- it really brought tears to my eyes … and ur very interesting interests … Film making! what a passion!
i will surely follow your blog and do my best to ..
well .. a friend of mine and i .. well actually .. some friends of mine .. hv great expectations for Islam and humanity … we dream of a world where titles and labels never set borders and lines, never cause blood sheds and tears and hatred, crimes, where what matters the most is the one being where all descended.. i would love to communicate with you on such human level .. maybe we can add something to each other …
simply we’ve decided to be come the change we want to see in the world!
as for muslims, we seek a msulim-muslim conversation first before we try to go out and conversate with the world and defend our distorted image! ..
yet i think it should go parallel with any civilization dialogues out there .. yet from a really knowledge and understanding of our selves … “To Thine Own Self Be True”..
The journey you strive to go on is within you .. that is the longest destination ..
this blog of urs have stirred so many griefs, hopes, fears and dreams of mine .. yet i must go back to my art and research … im pursuing a dream at the moment ..
see you next… see you in heaven
PaperPile ..
SakuraPassion said,
April 17, 2009 at 5:40 am
Hi,
I found you’re blog through Muslimah Media Watch. I just started reading it, and I like your post. They’re well written and you express your emotions quite beautifully. And you put alot of thought into your post. But I guess you should expect that from a mystic.
Charles said,
April 27, 2009 at 4:56 am
Why doest thou feel broken?
~ OS ~ said,
June 17, 2009 at 5:33 am
Salaam Jehanzeb,
I think I found the basic answer to the question I posed to you in my email
I’m gonna take a look around your fantastic new blog though, and await your reply inshaAllah.
Peace,
~ OS ~
Sarah Rahman said,
July 14, 2009 at 8:44 pm
I feel like relating to a part of your introduction.
Going through your blog is worth remembering, indeed.
Take care and stay blessed.
The Stain of Ignorance :: the Eloquent Bohemian/Constructed Environments said,
August 1, 2009 at 10:36 pm
[...] Broken Mystic, who just turned twenty-four earlier in February [...happy birthday!], is a very articulate and intelligent person, a devout Muslim, and someone I respect for his views on spirituality and religion and his poetry. His responses to the verbal outbreak of “Islamaphobia” on Beliefnet are well-written and address the ignorance of those who would wrap the heinous crime committed by Mr. Hassan in a blanket of a religious attack on Islam. [...]
hussain said,
October 19, 2009 at 2:44 am
your a weird idiot
brokenmystic said,
October 19, 2009 at 3:54 am
Thank you! So kind of you to say