Delirium

+Master Doorkeeper b
The mystics invited me to their gathering
On the way, a strange man met me on the road
He stood before me, eclipsing the sun in his black robes
He said, “Come to the carnival instead”

I followed him like a ghost crossing into another world
Where everything is spoken through symbols and metaphor
I watched as we passed through the crowded fair
Of old and young lost in the recreation of ancient folklore

Wizards with their tarot cards, magicians in medieval costumes
Mimes trapped in their imaginary prisons
Fire breathers lighting up the sky in wonder
Appearing like dragons in the imagination of children

A sun-colored butterfly fluttered amidst the strange
I followed its flight to a stone-faced audience
Watching the puppet show of Crusaders and Saracens
Hypnotized by the centuries of cruelty and violence

My eyes sank in sorrow
Not realizing that the man I came with
Vanished into the unknown
Leaving only a compass around my neck

It pointed to a tall, thin man watching me with his gothic eyes
A crystal ball levitating in the palm of his hand
I looked inside and saw myself soaring through clouded skies
He veiled the image and invited me into the large tent behind him

“Come, step inside,” he said

Walking through, I listened to the magical bells
Echoing in peaceful jubilee
As a garden bloomed on the concert stage
With rose petals raining like dream-like fantasy

A young girl dressed as a princess
Whirling beneath the falling tulips
With a halo hovering over her head
And a precious smile painted on her lips

She reminds me of the ocean’s dance
When I was another child
Dreaming about portals in the sea
And escaping far, far away into self-exile

For a moment, it was all happiness and bliss
Like living in a floating sphere vibrant with color
Like beautiful words blown into the wind
Touching skin and heart softly like an Angel’s kiss

But how transitory that was
When the wild lights began to spiral
And I heard those crazy circus clowns
Laughing wickedly on their unicycles

Their laughter reminds me of hellfire
Roaring through those endless fields of mine
Burning every flower, slaughtering every dream
Leaving nothing left to grow, nothing left to find

They juggled their sharp and deadly blades
Grinning at the audience like cardboard cartoons
Each dagger spinning and slicing through the air
I can only hear violence and murder in their tune

As if they were putting on a sadistic show
Where I was the dummy flown to the highest cloud
Only to have my strings cut and fall below
Deep into the heart of the darkest abyss

I left the tent, not wanting to stay any longer
Yet it were gypsy strings that called me to another street
Beyond the ferris wheel where families gathered
Beyond the swan boats where Lovers drifted upon the lake

I saw the fiddle player sitting upon a stage
Next to a luminous unicorn glowing like a star in Heaven
A magician bowed her head as the marveled audience clapped
Her eyes searched through the sea of faces and met mine in unison

She smiled and said, “I need a volunteer”

As if it was instinct and meant to be
I rose my hand and made my way through the masses
She opened her hand, waiting for me
Like a savior offering eternal refuge and escape

Our fingers touched, our hands merged
I felt my heart tremble as a current rippled inside
She drew me silently up the steps
Like I was the seeker and she the guide

“This Way,” she whispered
While walking me to a double-sided door
Nothing behind it, nothing within
Just a frame of wood, nothing more

She wrapped a blindfold around my eyes
Mystified and blinded in darkness
She told me I could remove it soon
After I opened the door and walked inside

I took my careful steps, hoping for answers
And closed the door behind me
I finally removed the blindfold
Only to find myself in a hall of spiraling mirrors

I turned around and reached for the knob
But watched it unscrew and fall to the crimson floor
Pounding at the door, I heard nothing from the other side
The past sealed shut – no other way but forward

I walked to the center of the room
Watching infinite reflections follow myself
Gazing deep into my own eyes, I saw a storm gather
The joys, the pain, the misery, the light, the gloom

I became lost in my own self
Not wanting the heart’s agony anymore
A desire to flee from this shell swept over me
A desire I never recognized before

I thought to myself and longed for escape:

I’d rather be a statue in the water fountain
Engraved with a smile on my face
Handing out roses to the lonely souls
Who just want to live in a beautiful place

I’d rather be a voice in your mind
Telling you that it’s going to be ok
As you drive home alone late at night
Dwelling on your sorrows and contemplating suicide

I’d rather be the ever-present spirit of Love
Holding you in arms, whispering comfort in your ears
As you weep over your broken heart
And wallow in unwanted fear

I’d rather be a guardian Angel
For an innocent prisoner sitting on death row
Adoring her paintings and releasing her from the shackles
Carrying her beautiful soul into the next life

I’d rather be a drop of rain
Kissing your cheek for comfort
Or a ray of light from the sun
Reminding your heart that it will shine again

I’d rather be the gentle breeze blowing through your hair
Accompanied by the magical tune of the santour
A sheet of wind wrapping around you
Carrying your imagination to a distant seashore

I’d rather be a vision of a better world
Rushing into the arms of artists and activists
Celebrating in tears of joy as each and every dream
Is made real and manifest

I’d rather feel nothing
No anger, no hate, no pain
No one to hurt, no one to blame
Nothing to take, nothing to gain

“I” would rather not exist

And suddenly, the hallway erupted in laughter
My eyes darted down both ends of the room
Before realizing it came from my reflection in the mirror
“Why do you laugh?” I ask

“Because you are the real lunatic,” he answered
Mysteriously, he stepped out of the reflection
Standing in front of me, he said: “Yet you remain a coward”
“For all you know how to do is merely speak of non-existence”

Without warning, like a being possessed
I broke the mirror with my fist
And with one swift motion
I slit my clone’s throat with a blade of glass

The blood splashed on the mirrors
The entire glass hallway shattered – Kshhh!!
The pieces flew into my skin
As the ground beneath me shook like an earthquake

I fell through the floor
And found myself tumbling through outer space
Debris floating around me as I plunged deeper
I became surrounded by stars, distant planets and nebulae

Comets, meteors, galaxies whirling in darkness
I spun like a pinwheel, spiraling in every direction
My arms extending, my fingers reaching
Reaching for something in desperation

Reaching for Love, hope, beauty
For happiness, joy, euphoria
For peace, balance, tranquility
For life, home – something, anything!

My skin turning pale
My body surrendering
My blood freezing to ice
My heart beginning to fail

A voice enters my mind – Look, over here!
I turn and see Simurgh – my old Friend
Soaring through the heavens like a shooting star
Oh, Simurgh, I thought you were dead

Carried by the solar winds
She swoops above me – bloodied from our past
Before I could smile, her talons dig into my chest
And violently tears me open

My screams suffocated by the cosmic void
Only tears and blood can trickle from my eyes
When murdered by the Friend of Love
Only the soul can fill the universe with my endless cries

Amidst the pain, I heard sound emerge in space
I saw Simurgh pulling stars with her flapping wings
Energy and light – They raced in my direction!
I heard music! – Like a symphony of strings!

Luminous orbs of plasma gathering like an ocean
And swirling like a solar typhoon
I heard them whistling through the dark
As they charged towards my open wound

I heard the orchestra’s crescendo
The chant of mystics resounding
The passion drums pounding
Duum! Duum! Duum!

I understood now
As the realization came to me
“Death before death”
The Way to eternity

O Giver of Love and Mercy!
You have cut me open
Pull Your storm
Into me

Flames shooting out of my eyes
And infinite rays of light beaming in every direction
As my heart swallowed Heaven’s fire
Every star filling me with divine resurrection

I have exploded into infinity
Sailing to that Love I cannot name
Expanding forever with the universe
Bidding farewell to yesterday’s “me”

And upon those memories of sorrow, I smile at you

I am Supernova
And you are Stargazer
Watch the multi-colored flame
Of my Being shine anew

~ Broken Mystic~

Meld in Ecstasy

dar_daman
Submissive on the prayer rug
Inhaling the clean scent of the night
Eyes shut – pulled into deep trance
Listen for that match to strike

There.

The soft glow of candlelight
Glistening on your skin like the moonlit sea
It is time to embrace those open arms
And feel the Beauty of the night

Hush.

Just feel the cool air
Kissing your luscious lips
Just listen for those secret whispers
Hidden in the serenity of prayer

Shhhh.

Touch that flame of desire
Yearning for body and soul to meld in ecstasy
Come – undress in the fire
Become clothed in the Seven Shades of Love

Breathe.

Divinity is Here
Just when you think you’re ready to speak
Beloved claps a hand over your mouth
And pulls you into the passionate sea

Swim with Me.

Now is not the time for words.
Let’s make music all night.

~Broken Mystic~

Zamin-e-Ahou (Guarantor of Gazelle)

guarantor_of_gazelle

Learn to stand in the Soul of the World
Learn to feel all the radiant colors of Life
Learn to merge with the Spirit of the Beloved
Learn to find your wings and journey skyward

Immerse in the Here and Now, in this precious Love
Hold your hands out, catch the raining snow
Kisses from the sky, winter flowers from above
Journey on and unlock the doors to hidden reality

Embrace the Spirit of Living
And you will see the Sacred Garden
Blooming for Imam Reza – the embodiment of Light
May the blessings of Angels and Divine be upon him

O’ Rose of the Empyrean
When you blossomed into smiles
The Earth never forgot your face
The hearts of poets poured like fountains

Nightingales sung your name
Lonely florets begged for your return
And the moon became the shining mirror of your Beauty
Like a guiding star in the silent night sky
A beacon for hope; worlds within worlds, a galaxy

All of Creation turned to you, illuminated Soul!
When the beautiful-bodied gazelle galloped your way
You told her there was nothing to fear
You said all danger would turn away

When the Hunter aimed his arrow upon her
The gazelle said to you:
Please tell the Hunter I must feed my children
They are starving, but I promise to return here
For I understand that my sacrifice
Serves as a benefit to other starving children

No one can speak to animals, the Hunter thought
How dare this so-called “Holy man” insult me!
And thus, he tightened his grip and prepared for release
But only to be mystified by the words of Divine serenity

Hunter, said the blessed Imam Reza
Let the gazelle go
Be patient
She will return
She has promised me

It was as if the entire forest listened
And to the Hunter’s astonishment
The gazelle returned after feeding her young
She returned fearless and sat with the Friend

The Hunter could not kill the animal
He realized her faith was greater than his
How unafraid she was of death
How willing she was to sacrifice for Holiness

He lowered his bow and realized
The Holy Imam was teaching a lesson to all of humanity
A beautiful lesson about the Way of Giving
Of compassion, gratefulness, and humility

How can you take an animal’s life
When you do not understand the lives they live?
What does “halal” mean to you
When your eating is simply impulsive?

Renounce your pompous pride
Renounce this foolish “sport” of point and shoot
The animal is not your wall trophy
Look not at the form or shape, but look inside
The earth is not your dominion
We share this place together
Be mindful to fellow Creation
And to the Master above

O’ Pearl of God’s Ocean
The Guarantor of Gazelle
The Love you teach opens the Portal of Union
Between the Outer and the Inner

Peace and Blessings to you, Imam Reza
Enlightened and Awakened one
Eighth Rose of Darling Fatima
Healer and Protector of the helpless

Beautiful Friend of Allah

~ Broken Mystic ~

After Iftar

After the blessed feast, I climb to the lone tower
Where I stare off into the cool night
And watch the world pass by below…
So troubled by its disbelief and destructive power
I see neither the Holy Book in my hand
Nor the stars sparkling above

My heart still reacts to the mute cries of humanity
Where is the Heaven that is near?
What have I learned from the morning of starvation?
Where is the hand to dry these tears?

Like an ethereal dream, a gust of wind flows from the sky
And takes shape of a beauteous translucent Angel
Her luminous fingers gently brush across my face like an art
The healing touch tells me to travel within and close my eyes

The vision of the Sea appears like an elegant Persian tapestry
I listen to the soothing waves crawl towards shore
And watch their pure waters dance like flowing garments
Waiting to enwrap their beloved in this Ocean of Love and Beauty

The fragrance of sweet vanilla maddens me and opens my eyes
To find the Angel’s candle lit beside the Holy Scripture with no abuse
I watch the pages dissolve and liquefy into tiny drops
Dripping into a drinking glass like Heavenly grape juice

The Angel reveals the face of my Beloved and swiftly swoops downward
Quenching my thirst, I consume the elixir of Love
And throw it hard to the concrete behind me,
Listen to the glass shatter and resonate passionately

I plunge off the balcony ledge as if it is my springboard,
And dive towards the depths of the unknown
I straighten my body like an arrow
Spiraling through the vapors of fear like a fearless cyclone

Appearing out of the mist, I see the Ocean my heart so longs for
But at the last moment, a chain tied to my foot catches me unexpectedly
And prevents the union, only a finger’s length away
A mermaid emerges from below to show me the way

She caresses my face softly as I hang upside down
Whispering in my ears, and breathing the warmth of Divine Secrets
Speaking in an unworldly language, She sings:
“Free yourself of the worldly chains without regret”

I gaze into Her eyes and see the Heaven She brought from the Sea
“Take Imam Ali’s sword and be free!” She says
As Rumi once said, ‘When the Ocean of Love comes,
Marry the experience at once!”

Listen to the sword whistle as I swing the blade and strike the shackles
The Music of Angels echo throughout the ocean blue
I splash into the Pure Waters and soak myself in Divine Love
Here my Ego drowns and my Spirit is filled with You

Accompanied by the wondrous sights of my dear Beloved
I swim to the Vision of Holy men and women
Show me the modest woman the Virgin Mary was
So that I may always be reminded of her when I attend my mother

Show me the compassionate Soul of Jesus
So that I may always show kindness and kiss the cheek of a brother
Show me the persistent heart of Moses
So that I always have the courage to endure challenges
Show me the Passionate Lover Muhammad was
So that I may fill my Soul with the Beloved

The Ocean leads me to shore where I find the Field of Unity
Slowly make Your way to this long haired Dervish, O Heart
As my hands stroke the dancing barley
Lift the veil of the Unseen and reveal the Beloved Friend!

Stand behind me and wrap Your arms over my shoulder
Let me collapse in Your arms and drift off into a deep sleep
And let me hear You say:
“The Angels, the Beloved, the Field, it is all Me.”

Silent in this field…
My eyes closed…
Arms open…
Here, so much Beauty is revealed:

I own nothing…
Everything is Yours…

Embrace Me, O Light…
Take Me…

Take Me, Beloved

I am Yours

~ Broken Mystic ~

Away with Separation

This is an old poem I wrote a few years ago. I felt like sharing it here. It was written for no one in particular, just for my fellow companions in this world. I’ve written this many times before, but we live in a world where there is more individuality and less community. It is important to establish independence, but at the same time, we shouldn’t feel that relying on our friends and Loved ones is a bad thing. On the contrary, we were created as social beings; we are all on this journey together and we need each other.

A Vision of the Universe awakens the Soul
Life soars, dives, spins, and rolls
Discover how small we are
Yet how precious at the same time

Sparkling dust reveals splendid gems
Leave your world behind
And pass through the Rose Portal
For it is Love from which you stem

Your world is of duality
People of colors, races, and genders divided
Ours is a world of unity
It is here where you feel alive!

Here, we do not say black or white
Here, we do not argue and fight
Here, we celebrate diversity
How wonderfully this delights the King!

Do not crush Flowers by saying “man” or “woman”
We believe in no such division!
The Prophet preached we are One
Fill your heart with this Truth and witness Divine union

After challenges, Lovers rest in arms, young
They listen to the mourning violin
And how it longs for the reward of patience
They are reminded of music they once strummed

By the Heavenly Rivers, they will marry
They will merge into a single Spirit
This is your destiny too, dear companions
To here, the Angels will carry

Beyond this Glorious Universe, we transcend
We can discover its blessed Secrets
Take my hand, I beg you, friend
And pass through this Portal with me

Let us become One

~ Broken Mystic~